Vinylicious

My www.dewaalart.com headboard

The Salty C Dog (a.k.a The Mommy) stumbled upon this little gem, and I have to admit she's played out of her boots. Lecia De Waal is the mastermind behind www.dewaalart.com and the magic happens from her studio in Hout Bay. Lecia's bag of tricks includes

• wall art
• art workshops
• fine art commissions
• styling
• design and drawing work 

Her work is all gorgeous, but in my opinion it's her vinyl range that's killer! Chandeliers and lighting, cats, tree silhouettes, bookshelves, picture frames, it's all there, in any colour you want. I'd been looking for a headboard for an age and couldn't find anything between the naff and the over-priced. And then I found these bad boys - a range of beautifully ornate vinyl headboards. Her website is decor p*rn for me and I pity the struggle that lies ahead in trying to stop yourself from covering your house in these easy-to-apply conversation pieces. I must confess, one couldn't quell my desire and I now have the birdcage hanging in the entrance hall too. At just R250, I might add. Her vinyl range is incredibly well priced, as is her shipping at just R140 to anywhere in SA. 

Click here to play!

Yours in support of South African design, 

brandslut xoxo

C is for Con.

Cell C's impression of the South African public

I actually feel a little bit sick when I think of the R160 million Cell C has recently managed to waste on South Africa’s Most Unsuccessful Rebrand. I can’t help but feel that Cell C, its agency and board think I’m stupid. There’s no other explanation for this incredibly embarrassing debacle that’s unraveling. 

So there’s hype and excitement as Trevor Noah’s face is splashed across billboards nationwide, introducing the company’s new CEO (Customer Experience Officer).  I see what they did there. We’re all praising Cell C for its realisation of the need for change and the importance of putting the customer at the heart of it all. And then the confusion sets in. The iconic red, white and dots are replaced by a black copyright symbol with a funny strip of rainbow beneath it. Huh? Surely someone, somewhere along this R160 million rebrand process would have looked into trademark infringement, especially where the iconic copyright symbol (©) is concerned.  Rocket science, anyone?

And then the confusion turns into anger and disbelief as light is shed on the con that is Trevor Noah and his relationship with the cellular service provider. You see, we’re led to believe that Trevor had used his comedic platform to slate Cell C for its cuck customer service. Cell C is made aware of Trevor’s rant via social media platforms YouTube and Facebook and the cellular service provider decides to deal with the criticism head-on, admitting to its faults and endeavoring change. And we all think, “Wow, isn’t it great that this company is realising the value of social media and is using it to facilitate change through putting the customer first!” Click here to to see Trevor's gig.

And then a little homework is done and it is revealed that www.telltrevor.co.za was registered in June, weeks before Trevor Noah’s not-so-impromptu stand-up gig which we’re led to believe was the catalyst for Cell C’s change campaign.

Sis, Cell C.

So you see, this is all one big bullsh*t PR exercise and slap in the face of the South African public and what grates me the most is Cell C’s new promise of transparency, which is exactly how they’re not handling  this expensive brand disaster. So I guess Cell C isn’t really putting the customer at the heart of it all, after all. 

brandslut xoxo

Service Ace

Sex on the beach

I've just returned from a ridonculously sloth-like 5 nights in Mauritius. You see, I've had two winters in a row (the sacrifice made to experience the World Cup) and The Rain Man decided to treat me to a paradisiacal birthday at hotel Paradis in Le Morne. Whilst attempting to brown my bum and taking a breather from A Durable Fire (do yourself a favour and get your paws on the sequel, starting with Blood Sisters, written by Barbara and Stephanie Keating), I lay racking my brain in pursuit of a suitable blog for my return. The answer was clear: service. Okay, maybe service with Phoenix beer following closely behind.

So, Mauritius isn't cheap anymore and spending R50 on a beer makes  the swallowing a little harder. But. And it's a big one. The service is absolutely phenomenal, flawless. Mauritian hotel staff do everything with a smile and no request is too much trouble. Paracetemol at 6AM? Pas de problem. Customising the set-menu? Pas de problem. Swimming with Spinner dolphins? Pas de problem. And the list goes on. Chatty, helpful, happy staff - a nice change from the norm back home. Yawn. And I say norm because on average I feel South African service leaves a lot to be desired. In total we probably encountered around 60 staff and service providers in 6 days, ranging from beach vendors to chauffeurs, and not one did disappoint. In the end spending R100 on your bottom of the range cocktail doesn't feel like assault because the love that goes into making it and serving it is tangible. 

You know, sh*t aint cheap anymore and companies in South Africa need to realise that fabulous service is paramount. It's a non-negotiable, or at least it should be. Great customer service takes the edge off and encourages positive word of mouth. Investment in training in this arena deserves a little more budget and I hope that we'll one day give those smiley happy Hindu Mauritians a run for their Rupees. With an additional 130 000 to 290 000 tourists expected annually from 2011 on account of the World Cup effect, let's take a leaf from our tourism-oriented neighbours. 

Yours with a bum a few shades browner, 

brandslut xoxo

I Anatomically Correct Heart Design

I heart this

I'm a sucker for anything quirky and couldn't resist this little bad boy from Tiaan Nagel @ 44 Stanley. Designer Geraldine Fenn of Anatomy Design loves a good bone and all things anatomically correct. Who can resist a necklace packaged in a real live medical Vacutainer? Not me. Swoon. 

Click here to check out Anatomy's bag of tricks.

Wear your heart around your neck, 

brandslut xoxo

In Good We Trust

Nedbank Capital - do gooders

I guess you can assume a campaign is working when exposure to a brand influences your dreams. I dreamt the other night that I was at war with a friend over the benefits of Nedbank versus ABSA. Huh? I know, maybe I need to get out more, or drink more, or something. Anyhoo, Jozi dwellers will have noticed Nedbank Capital's new Greening The CBD solar-powered robots around Sandton and the surrounds. This solar-powered billboard punting Nedbank's extra green status caught my eye [and nearly caused an accident] and reminded me of an article I read recently written by Gary Harwood of HKLM fame. Make The Message Mean Something is about building bus shelters instead of billboards, about marketers taking responsibility for ensuring the power and influence brands possess is applied across society and the community in a positive way.

"Yes, it's about social upliftment and community involvement, but it's also about building a social conscience into the DNA of a brand so that everything that the brand does is informed by this conscience. It's not an add-on, but rather an add-in. In the end, those brands with a humanitarian heart will be the most sustainably successful brands in Africa. The evidence is around us."

I love this mantra and hope that brand managers and marketeers the world over realise the value in  brand karma and keeping goodness at the core.

I must confess that although my initial response to Nedbank Capital's campaign was a positive one, I then immediately wondered "are these things really powering the robots they promise to?".You'll be pleased to know that all is green, good, and in fact pretty damn impressive - read Nedbank Capital's official press release here.

Yours in all things good, 

brandslut xoxo

The Little Things

Gautrain - doing things properly

I had my first virgin Gautrain experience a few weeks ago en route to see The Mommy and was generally blown away. Please mind the puns, I couldn't help myself. You see, I'm a stickler for design and detail and was impressed to see that no detail had been spared, not even on the carpets. As you can see by my image, tiny little embroidered Gautrains tile the length of the gangway carpets. Most people probably haven't noticed this. Brand people might. But I certainly did. Not only are the carpets branded, clean and generally awesome, but the service was great and the reduced time to the airport even better. Sure, there are kinks in the system as the train was launched prematurely to accommodate the FIFA Football World Cup, but I think all involved have done a cracking job thus far. It's going to be interesting to see how the imminent toll-road implementation by SANRAL is going to affect the Gautrain and public transport use in Gauteng in general. In-ter-rest-ing.

A little attention to detail goes a long way and I hope to see more South African brands realising the value in the little things. Let's hope the anti chewing-gum laws on-board remain firm and that we manage to keep this beautiful train and service clean and enjoyable for all. 

Yours in the detail, 

brandslut xoxo

Silly Willoughby

W&C - putting salt on the wound

Maybe I'm a snob, but I have a problem with this. I recently popped into Willoughby & Co. in Hyde Park Shopping Centre, Johannesburg for a couple o' salmon hand-rolls and a warming bowl of Miso soup - my favourites. You can image my surprise when in return for being asked to drop 42 clams on a hand-roll, I was expected to use Cerebos table salt, straight from the original plastic packaging, nogal. Now, being handed a small Cerebos cellar upon request would have been bad enough, but this South African family staple actually comprised the table setting.

Maybe I'm a dinosaur, but I think Willoughby & Co. could have a little more tact than this, especially considering their sushi prices err on the expensive side. Surely sea or rock salt in a grinder would be a nicer touch. And hell, if you're trying to improve your cost of sale by resorting to the cheapest table salt possible, at least have the foresight to decant your Cerebos into something a little nicer. Why not go a step further and commission a group of disadvantaged potters to produce a range of fish shaped salt pots?

Naughty Willoughby. 

brandslut xoxo

Woolies' Black Gold

The Woolies cappuccino - it's not shit

It's only fitting that my first post is about coffee, the black gold that pulses through the veins of cities and addicts the world over. Having worked for Starbucks UK, Vida e Caffe and alongside the ex Marketing Director of Costa Coffee UK, I guess you could say I'm passionate about the stuff. As a purveyor of all things brand, I notice things, challenge promises and appreciate beautiful design. 

A brand that seldom disappoints is good ol' Woolies and you can imagine my meerkat like response when I recently noticed their Woolworths Cuppuccino "The Best" campaign. Sjoe. Huge shout, Susman. I'll decide that for myself, thank you. Now, whilst I certainly have allegiances to brands due to memories forged and experiences had, I welcome a lil' healthy competition with open arms. It's competition that drives COO's and Marketing Directors to reevaluate service levels and product quality. It's this duelling that ultimately leads to some fun inter-brand banter and hopefully a happier customer behind the bill. Woolies, I gotta give you credit. Your Woolworths Cafe baristas have been excellently trained and your cappuccino is bloody marvellous (perfect espresso to milk ratio, orgasmic foam). I've had about 10 now (no, not in this sitting) and I think it's safe to say you've done your homework. An opportunity was identified, a demand realised, a product and marketing campaign implemented and you've made at least one customer smile.  

I think coffee brands like Mugg & Bean and Seattle Coffee Co. could take a leaf. I've had average experiences at both recently and in this market who wants to be remembered as average? I mean, coffee is your bag guys, please serve me a decent espresso.

Yours in all things caffeine based, 

brandslut xoxo